


A Golden Age Projection

by shift



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Cuddling, Fluff, Getting Together, Light Angst, M/M, Making Out, Multi, Non AU, Non-Linear Narrative, eventually will include the rest of 00line dw, uwu
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-21
Updated: 2018-11-23
Packaged: 2019-04-04 13:53:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14021688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shift/pseuds/shift
Summary: Getting together is weird.





	1. flame that feeds my fire

**Author's Note:**

> i'm majorly re-upping this to make it less um. immature. but i'm gonna keep this version around because i'd like to see the differences and thought you guys might want to, too! not sure when i'll finish the new version but keep on the lookout for it!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from desire by joan jett and the blackhearts !
> 
> so um.. i was thinkin about a lot when i wrote this.  
> 1\. i guess hyuck cusses a lot? i cant remember when this was said but i think it was marko that said it and like.. it makes sense so . sorry he kinda has a potty mouf  
> 2\. hyuck? calling renjun his soulmate? and vice versa? um yes PLS  
> 3\. jaemin saying hes actually rly stubborn and then jeno is a taurus like TRUST ME we're all stubborn
> 
> this is kinda messy n probably gonna make no sense rip but i had to post this now or else it would never happen

they brush their teeth together in silence. renjun looks at jeno's half-closed eyes in the mirror, studying his own messy bedhead next. it's quite a sight to see. they'd had a late night of practice after promotions, and were too wired to go right to bed. this results in, of course, the whole group being dead asleep. if he were even a smidgen less awake, he might have missed jaemin squeezing in through the door. jaemin throws his arms around the two, jostling them enough that jeno nearly loses his grip on the mouthwash. "my boys."

jaemin releases them to reach for his toothbrush. he's way too cheery for 6AM, and renjun can tell that jeno shares this sentiment. they watch jaemin coat his toothbrush in disgust. jaemin notices them staring when he looks up. "what? my mouth tastes extra gross this morning."

"uh huh," renjun mutters. jaemin elbows him in the side, causing renjun to fall to the side dramatically. jaemin grins at him. renjun arranges himself on the floor so that he can sit comfortably. it's not a problem if he waits for the other two to be finished before he leaves.

jeno spits his mouthwash in the sink and turns to leave. his hand is on the doorknob when jaemin grabs his wrist and says with a mouthful of foam, "wait for me."

jeno narrows his eyes at jaemin, catlike, but complies, settling himself on the closed toilet seat. renjun sees that he's still got sleep in his eyes.

it's a few more minutes before jaemin is done with his teeth-brushing-face-washing routine, and renjun knows he's dragging it out. he tries to give jeno a Look to see if he's noticed too, but jeno's just staring at the ground blankly, trying not to fall back asleep.

"i, uh, i gotta tell you guys something," jaemin says finally. even his voice sounds nervous. renjun knows that's when he's trying to pretend that everything is okay. jeno leans forward on the toilet lid, bracing both hands on his knees. renjun looks up at him from the floor. jaemin turns away from the mirror, shutting his eyes. he takes a deep breath and says, voice shaking, "i made out with donghyuck."

renjun holds back his grin as he watches jeno's eyebrows rocket sky high. he lives for drama. "you _what_?"

"sorry, i'm sorry," jaemin appologizes frantically, dropping his tube of moisturizer in the sink. it clatters loudly. "i was gonna tell you sooner."

"sooner?" jeno nearly yells, incredulous. "how much sooner?"

"a week?" jaemin's voice is so small. renjun has to cover his mouth to keep from laughing. "are you mad?"

"yes!" jeno says, standing up. he looks very non-threatening in his kitty pajamas. still, jaemin takes a step back. "i'm mad that you kissed him before i did!"

"huh?" jaemin freezes. renjun bursts into laughter, muffled by his hands. they both look down at him, eyes wide.

"did you know about this?" jeno asks accusingly.

"yeah." renjun is still giggly, but he gets to his feet. "in my defense, donghyuck is really bad at keeping secrets."

"oh." the other two say it at the same time.

"hold on," jeno mutters. renjun quickly checks jaemin's expression. he looks flushed. "since when are you close with donghyuck?"

"since we've been making out," renjun shrugs. there's no point in being ashamed. jeno's ears grow red at this, and renjun can tell they're not the embarrassed type of red.

"you too?" renjun nods. "does he have a schedule or something? do i have to book an appointment?"

"just hope you get lucky," jaemin mutters. then, he realizes something, and pushes jeno's chest lightly. "don't you have a cuddling schedule with him?"

"this isn't about me, this is about you making out with my best friend and not telling me!" jeno is nearly seething. so much for being even-tempered.

"are you really jealous?" jaemin asks, taunting him. it's so stupid. this is so fucking stupid. renjun groans, throwing his hand out to stabilize himself when he stumbles from the force of it. jeno catches him, but immediately pushes him towards jaemin, who deflects him towards the sink.

"who said he's your best friend?" jaemin hisses.

"who said he's yours to kiss?"

renjun ends up doubled over laughing. the hilarity of the situation is too much for him to handle, and the stupidity. the irony, too, because just last night he was talking to donghyuck about... anyway, he knows he should try to mediate, or at least get them to calm down and talk it out, but--he lives in the moment, alright? and at this moment, he's busy laughing his ass off. he doesn't even register the silence behind him.

suddenly, the door slams open. jeno and jaemin back off each other like magnets connected at the wrong ends. renjun wipes the tears gathered in the corners of his eyes and looks over his shoulder to see ten, looking very much like a disgruntled cat, standing in the doorway. he says menacingly, "unlike you, some of us don't have to be to work at the asscrack of dawn."

"sorry," renjun mumbles. jaemin and jeno appologize too, albeit almost inaudible. this is good enough for ten, who stomps back to his bedroom, shutting the door forcefully. renjun looks at the other two. jaemin wipes his mouth on the back of his hand, leaning against the wall. jeno is very pointedly looking at a corner of the ceiling nowhere near jaemin, arms folded across his chest. he looks good with his jaw set like that--renjun shakes his head. it takes him a few moments to realize that they're both too stubborn to even leave first.

"let's go get ready," renjun says loudly. jeno glares at him and walks out to their room. jaemin rolls his eyes, following after him to his own. renjun trails after them.

when he reaches his room, jeno is angrily pulling his jeans on, muttering to himself. renjun has half a mind to tell him he might rip a hole in them if he's not careful, but would rather not risk his life the day of a performance. instead, he takes his phone off the charger.

 

 **injun, 6:35 am** _omg you'll never guess what just happened_

-

 **soulmate, 6:59 am** _you died_

 

jisung peers over renjun's shoulder to see what's funny enough to make him snort. renjun elbows him in the side and twists in his seat towards the car window so that he can't see.

 

 **injun, 6:59 am** _dumbass_

 **injun, 6:59 am** _jeno and jaemin were fighting over you_

 **soulmate, 7:00 am** _WHAT_

 **soulmate, 7:00 am** _I_ _JUST YELLED SO LOUD_

 **soulmate, 7:00 am** _DOYOUNG TOLD ME TO SHUT UP_

 **soulmate, 7:01 am** _ARE YOU SERIOUS?????_

 **injun, 7:01 am** _yeah i was in the bathroom with them_

 **soulmate, 7:01 am** _so... wait_

 **soulmate, 7:01 am** _now jeno knows i'm a hoe huh :/_

 **injun, 7:01 am** _actually_

 **injun, 7:02 am** _he's mad you haven't made out with him yet_

 **soulmate, 7:02 am** _um.... all he had to do was ask???_

 

renjun presses his phone screen to his chest as jisung leans into his side, whining. "i want to see." renjun pushes him by the forehead. jisung doesn't budge. renjun sighs and looks down at the screen.

 

 **soulmate, 7:02 am** _tbh i'm mad at me for not making out with him yet_

 **injun, 7:03 am** _why don't you do it then?_

 **soulmate, 7:04 am** _omg injun ur mind... i never fuckin thought of that before_

 **injun, 7:04 am** _i'm gonna murder you_

 **soulmate, 7:04 am** _that's kinky_

 **soulmate, 7:04 am** _harder daddy_

 

the car jostles over a pothole particularly hard, allowing jisung to get a full view of the conversation. he backs up out of renjun's face impressively fast.

 

 **soulmate, 7:04 am** _uuhhhhnnn daddy i need you_

 **injun, 7:05 am** _can you shut up for two seconds_

 **soulmate, 7:05 am** _n_ _o_

 **injun, 7:05 am** _why don't we all kiss each other and stop getting jealous_

 **soulmate, 7:05 am** _we do though?_

 **injun, 7:05 am** _no i mean in the same room_

 **soulmate, 7:06 am** _oh_

 **soulmate, 7:06 am** _like an orgy_

 

renjun drops his phone into his lap, tilting his head back against the headrest. he takes a deep sigh.

"are you okay?" chenle asks. he's turned around in the front seat to talk to jisung.

"i don't think you should ask," jisung whispers to him. chenle shrugs. renjun takes his phone back into his hands.

 

 **injun, 7:07 am** _fine sure whatever_

 **soulmate, 7:07 am** _oh man im gettin my dick wet tonight_

 **soulmate, 7:08 am** _FUKC T_ _AEYONG WAS JUST LOOKIGN OVER MY SHOULDER_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>  
> 
> [cc](https://curiouscat.me/mfalmp4)  
> 


	2. open heart, open mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof warning for boys making out and kinda vague mention of a hard on. there's also mentions of involvement with the others but it's all kinda vague because we will find out more about it later probably
> 
> title is from kissing strangers by dnce! the vibe of the song is totally not fitting at all but i felt like the line fit well with this chapter so

**nana, 11:53 pm** _are u still up?_

**hyuck, 11:53 pm** _yeah just got my ass beat in overwatch again_

**nana, 11:54 pm** _wanna sleep together?_

jaemin kicks his sheets disdainfully. his impulsivity has once again gotten the best of him, so he's gone and sent donghyuck this weird-sounding message. hopefully, donghyuck has known him long enough to know to just roll with it.

**hyuck, 11:55 pm** _what the hell_

hyuck leaves the convo there for a few minutes, and jaemin is kind of too embarrassed to send a follow up reply. he waits around, fiddling with some games on his phone, until donghyuck texts him back.

**hyuck, 11:59 pm** _taeyong said it's fine. i'll be there in 10_

jaemin grins, relieved, and switches on his lamp to make a quick attempt to clean his room. this consists of shoving clean(?) clothes into drawers and kicking a few items under the bed. just as he's hopping back into bed, there comes a quiet knock at the door. donghyuck comes in a few seconds later with a bright smile despite the late hour. he pads over softly and slips under the blankets beside jaemin. his body heat is familiar and welcome.

"what's up?" donghyuck asks curiously. "kind of late, isn't it?"

jaemin props himself up on one arm to look at him. "i just wanted to talk, i guess."

donghyuck hums and turns over to yank jaemin's phone charger out of the socket, replacing it with his own. jaemin lets him because he knows he's just being an ass. "i thought you've been talking with injunnie lately."

"i miss you, though." jaemin replies honestly. he really has. even though they're in the same group, donghyuck still manages to feel out of reach. it would be a bold-faced lie to say they're every bit as close as they were before they debuted. however, it's not just donghyuck that feels far away. all of the hyungs do, too. he just craves that closeness more with donghyuck. he isn't really sure why.

donghyuck turns back around to smile at him, and huffs playfully, "what's with all the flirting, huh?"

they both giggle at this comment, and jaemin takes a moment to look at him for the first time in awhile. his hair is dyed a soft brown now, much like jaemin's own. he's lost all the baby fat that used to be in his cheeks, and his face has matured well. it feels like the first time he's seen donghyuck like this. he realizes with a pang that they're both going to turn 18 soon.

it occurs to him when their eyes meet that donghyuck is looking at him in this same way. it's hard to see, but he can tell that donghyuck's cheeks go a little red. odd. donghyuck keeps the eye contact, though, and whispers accusingly, "are you trying to romance me?"

"maybe," jaemin whispers back boldly. he can feel donghyuck's hand come up to play with the drawstring of his sweatshirt. it feels intimate and good, but he's kind of got something on his mind, so he blurts out, "are you and jeno a thing?"

donghyuck looks taken aback. jaemin feels bad for asking so outright, but he feels even worse about... whatever these unnamed feelings are. donghyuck shakes his head, though, and says questioningly, "i thought you and jeno were a thing..?"

"oh," is all jaemin can say. because, well. it kind of feels like they are. it's confusing.

"yeah," donghyuck says, and bumps their legs together. "but then i thought maybe you and renjun were a thing because of the couple watches and, like, the fans did, but the fans read into everything too much, so..."

he trails off. his hand leaves the string and instead fiddles with jaemin's hood. jaemin looks down at donghyuck again, who is looking away this time. jaemin can really see the color on his cheeks now. he's biting his lip nervously, too, and it's so cute that it makes jaemin's heart ache in a weird way. all he can bring himself to do is take in how good donghyuck looks like this. his chest swells at the fact that he is the one that's made donghyuck like this. he is the reason for the blush on his cheeks.

"have you kissed jeno?" donghyuck asks suddenly, jerking jaemin's attention back. "i have."

"me too," jaemin replies. only once, not that donghyuck needs to know. jaemin isn't sure why he feels the need to hide that fact.

"i kiss renjun, too," hyuck says innocently. jaemin is about to say something like, "that's nothing, even mark has," when he realizes exactly what donghyuck has just said.

"wait, like, often?"

donghyuck grins. jaemin pins him flat onto the bed by his shoulders eagerly. "what the hell, why didn't either of you ever tell me?"

donghyuck laughs and wiggles under his grasp, but jaemin is a lot stronger than him. he struggles for a few more seconds before he gives up and admits, "i didn't want you or jeno to find out how good of a kisser he is."

"oh, so now you're hoarding, huh?" jaemin lets his arms give out so that he collapses atop donghyuck, both of them laughing. the boy below him takes it in stride and loops his arms around jaemin's neck. they fall sideways, letting their heads turn to look at each other, and jaemin drops his eyes down to donghyuck's lips--just out of curiousity. they're full and pretty, and he finds it interesting that the top one is a little bigger than the bottom. he wonders what they would feel like between his teeth.

"i'm a good kisser, too." jaemin watches donghyuck's lips move, captivated. he watches them move closer until he can't see them anymore, and--

truth be told, jaemin has never actually kissed someone like this. donghyuck is so close that their chests are pressed together, and his hands are curled around jaemin's neck. he's not really sure where to put his hands, so he settles them somewhere along donghyuck's waist and gets a sound of approval. eventually, donghyuck fists a hand in the front of his hoodie, and jaemin lets himself be dragged down on top of him to a comfortable position. he has to prop himself up on one arm, actually, and his neck hurts a little, but it's okay if it means he gets to feel donghyuck like this.

after awhile, jaemin really can't breathe anymore, and thinks there might be a dangerous situation soon. donghyuck snorts out a laugh and kisses his neck softly. jaemin gently pushes him away, flopping onto his back next to donghyuck and closing his eyes. donghyuck appologizes a little sheepishly. jaemin shakes his head. "no, it's alright. you were good."

donghyuck flips the lamp off and settles into the blankets next to him. jaemin feels a little bad for ending it like that, so he reaches out to grab his hand. donghyuck lets him take it and curls into his side, head on jaemin's shoulder. jaemin falls asleep filled with a warm, happy glow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>  
> 
> [cc](https://curiouscat.me/mfalmp4)  
> 


	3. wet and real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> play, tease, avoid confrontation, play again. that's renjun for you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW i'm so sorry about the long wait oops but here's this?? hahaha??? part of why this took so long is that i've been kind of working on ideas for the other chapters and it was just easier for me to flesh those out than this was. also to be honest i'm still not sure if this fic even makes any sense anymore so i did drop a link to my cc at the bottom if you wanna come ask me questions about it (or if you just want to chat!)
> 
> title from lovers by the runaways which is waayy too sexual of nature for this chapter i just,,. nothing else fit ;;

it kind of, um. it kind of starts like this. donghyuck worms his way into renjun's bed after practice. he's too exhausted to take the however-many (few, honestly) steps to his own dorm and he's not going to ask mark to carry him. renjun all but shoves him off the bed. donghyuck wraps his arms and legs around the smaller boy's body, holding tight.

 

"what do you want," renjun mumbles sleepily.

donghyuck grins, pillowing his head on renjun's shoulder and relaxing into a more comfortable position. "i wanna stay here. right here."

donghyuck hears renjun sigh and he knows he's won. he allows himself to relax against the older boy's body. it's quiet, peaceful then, but donghyuck's mind is still moving. all he can think about is renjun. he can feel breath on his skin, hair against his cheek, skin against his own. it's a little too much, so he props himself up to rearrange their position. the angle isn't right, though, and instead he finds himself falling forward. he usually doesn't go with his gut as much as he is in this moment, but it's almost 2AM and fuck it.

shit. shit. donghyuck withdraws quickly, hardly giving renjun time to process what just happened, and hides in the blankets. his lips tingle in a bad way, seeing as he all but smashed their faces together. his heart tingles, too, shakes something terrible inside his chest. he doesn't know why. it distracts him so much that he can't even come up with a way to save face, which scares him even more. he feels bare and open. it is a very un-donghyuck-like way to feel.

slowly, donghyuck feels the blankets pull away from his face. he squeezes his eyes shut as tight as possible, waiting for renjun to tell him how gross he is, but it never happens. instead, renjun kisses him back. it's somewhat misjudged (it's more on his chin than lips) and very brief. it's so brief, in fact, that donghyuck can't grab the front of renjun's shirt fast enough to get him to stay there. before he can even open his eyes all the way, renjun turns over, facing the other way, and says firmly, "goodnight, haechan."

donghyuck considers bugging him about it, but jeno enters the room and collapses on his own bed then. he watches jeno prepare for bed sleepily, and before he knows it, he's hopping into bed beside jeno for some snuggles. he hopes that renjun will understand. jeno is a very good cuddler, and donghyuck likes to cuddle when he's tired. how could anyone pass up that opportunity?

 -

donghyuck honest to god forgets about it. renjun acts completely normal, if not a little more touchy, so it doesn't even cross his mind. he's finally reminded of the incident months later, when they're in the recording studio for joy. he's joking around with jisung and chenle when his phone goes off.

 

**renjun, 12:03 pm ** _meet me in the bathroom in five minutes_

 

donghyuck glances at him across the room. he's put his phone in his pocket already and is talking with their vocal instructor. jisung and chenle are still messing around, and jeno and mark are deep in some boring discussion about boring people things. he decides to get a head start. he's hardly down the hall before he's being shoved into the bathroom forcefully. renjun fists his hands in donghyuck's shirt, shaking him back and forth. "why did you kiss me?"

donghyuck's eyes widen. bewildered, he blurts out, "i really wanted to."

it's an honest answer. donghyuck grabs renjun's forearms, pushing him away, but renjun holds on tight to his shirt. donghyuck can tell by the look in his eyes that renjun doesn't believe him. donghyuck follows up with, "i can show you that i really wanted to."

renjun's grip relaxes. he hesitates. donghyuck watches him process what he said, watches renjun's expression change. he keeps his eyes focused right on renjun's even when renjun's gaze drops down to his lips. renjun's cheeks turn pink when he catches himself.

"ok," renjun whispers, eyes focusing on one of donghyuck's moles. donghyuck mentally uncrosses his fingers and closes the gap.

it's not that good. honestly, it's kind of really bad. renjun kisses with too much force and donghyuck doesn't even know what to do past "press lips here." they only stick with it for a few seconds before donghyuck pulls away, disgust written all over his face.

"you don't know what you're doing," renjun says immediately, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. 

donghyuck can hardly keep himself from rolling his eyes. "neither do you."

"i do! and at least i tried," renjun defends himself. he lets go of donghyuck's shirt, tugging on the hem to losen the wrinkles. he keeps his eyes down when he says, "we should get back to the studio."

donghyuck barely manages to take renjun's hand before they're out of the bathroom. renjun stops in his tracks, surprized, but donghyuck just drags him along, grinning. he'll be damned if he lets renjun act weird about this.

 

the thing about renjun is that he wears his heart on his sleeve. after the incident, donghyuck watches renjun trail after jeno in an attempt to show.. indepedence? dominance? donghyuck isn't sure what. all he knows is that renjun is trying to play some game with him. he shouldn't mind it. he likes games too, but he's been having other problems--

"what's up?" mark asks, plopping down beside him. donghyuck scoots away on instinct. mark's face falls, but he continues on, "you look weird, i wanted to make sure you were okay."

donghyuck closes his eyes, pressing his back flush to the couch behind him. he grits his teeth, hoping mark isn't gonna push it. "i'm fine."

"okay," mark says quietly, "but i miss you. i know you kind of hate me right now, but--"

"i miss you too," donghyuck says before he even registers it. did he take honesty pills this morning? he feels mark jump beside him. donghyuck opens his eyes, turning to face him. in the corner of his eye, he sees renjun watching. "i'm sorry i was so stupid."

mark shakes his head vigorously. "no, it was me! i know you're really big on skinship and i had a talk with johnny about it, he said maybe you like it with me because i'm the closest to your age in 127 so i'm just going to let you do you now. again, i'm really sorry."

the room falls silent as mark speaks. donghyuck ignores the others, just looking at mark. he needs to do this for two reasons: one, he misses his best friend, and two, he needs someone to scheme with about this renjun thing. he takes a deep breath. "i accept your appology. and, i'm sorry for not respecting your personal space. i'll try to be better about that from now on."

"i accept your appology, too," mark says, grinning. it's only two seconds before they both lunge forward for a big hug. the others in the room, including their vocal coach, cheer. jeno, in the recording booth, yells out "fucking finally!"

donghyuck can feel renjun's eyes on him even afterward, curious. it feels good. it feels like he won this round.

-

renjun and chenle are over to visit with sicheng. it's a couple weeks after that second kiss, and donghyuck has used those two weeks to watch and read an embarrassing amount of kissing tutorials. he think's he's well-read on the topic now, and with perfect timing.

renjun is alone in the kitchen making tea. donghyuck watches him from the doorway, ducking away every time he thinks he may be seen. he takes his chance when renjun turns to the cabinet where the sugar is. donghyuck runs forward, wrapping his arms around renjun from behind, pinning his arms to his sides. renjun jumps so hard in surprize that he knocks donghyuck in the jaw, rendering him momentarily blind. donghyuck is very strong-willed, though, and effectively pulls renjun into his room with minimal fight so that the two of them can chat. quick, precise, and to-the-point.

this is a lie. renjun is a fucking powerhouse. he kicks and yells as donghyuck drags him down the hallway, causing some of the members to shout at them to shut up from their rooms. donghyuck tries to cover his mouth with one hand, but renjun easily squirms out of his hold and dashes down the hallway towards sicheng's door. fuck. he arrives with donghyuck hot on his heels, turning the doorknob like a madman, but sicheng must have locked it when he heard the commotion. donghyuck slams into renjun from behind, pressing him into the door with a thump.

chenle calls through the door in mandarin as donghyuck tries fruitlessly to get his hands on renjun's mouth or around his waist or something again. renjun is just too squirmy for donghyuck to keep up with. in fact, as soon as donghyuck starts to get tired, renjun easily pins donghyuck to the ground and plops onto his stomach. donghyuck lets him hold his wrists above his head, basking in the glow of the adrenaline. renjun pants hot breath all over his face and it's actually a little gross but it's okay too because he's _really_ cute. yeah.

they catch their breath like that, on the floor in the hallway, until taeil nearly trips over the two of them on his journey to his room, muttering, " _weird kids_." renjun quickly scrambles to his feet in response. donghyuck lays there still, expecting renjun to leave like nothing ever even happened, because that's how huang renjun usually does things. play, tease, avoid confrontation, play again. that's renjun for you. but this time, renjun holds out his hand for donghyuck, who takes it hesitantly.

"did you want to talk to me?" renjun asks, looking down the hall at donghyuck's room. his face is really red. it's cute. donghyuck can't help but want to tease him, now.

"maybe i did. maybe i just wanted to mess with you," he feigns nonchalance.

renjun rolls his eyes at him. "sure, whatever. i'm going to go steal a pair of your shorts."

 

donghyuck follows him to his own room, breathing a sigh of relief when jaehyun isn't there. it's odd, though, because renjun doesn't go toward the dresser at all. he heads straight for donghyuck's bed, laying out across it. _oh._ donghyuck is pretty sure they're in the same frame of mind now, so he shuts the door and joins renjun on his bed.

"i wanna kiss you again," renjun says, sitting upright.

donghyuck grins, shifting to get comfortable. he's a little nervous. "me too."

"cool," renjun mutters, then smashes their lips together.

it's only slightly less awkward than before at first because donghyuck still doesn't really know what to do. renjun kisses like he's done this before, at least that's what donghyuck thinks, and it makes him nervous because this isn't really the kind of thing you can fake. also, how did renjun even learn to kiss like this in the first place?

once he gets the hang of it, though, donghyuck loses track of how long they kiss for. he finds renjun's enthusiasm easy for him to match, with sloppy kisses and hands running through hair haphazardly. it's fun. renjun is really cute like this, so he lets renjun kind of just have his way when he maneuvers donghyuck into a better position. he lets renjun kiss him hard, lets him bite his lip, lets him pull his hair a little bit. it's a lot to take in, but donghyuck is good at adjusting to things quickly, especially things as nice and fun and exciting as this.

they pull apart with a gross kind of smacking noise when they hear feet outside the door. donghyuck grins at the sight of renjun's face. his cheeks are a little flushed, his hair a little messy, his lips a little wet. it's a good look. donghyuck wants to see it on him again. renjun looks like he's thinking the same thing.

"i should probably leave, i think," renjun says regretfully, dropping his hands from where they've fisted into donghyuck's hair. he has the decency to look embarrassed after he's had his lips on donghyuck's for--donghyuck checks the clock on his nightstand--nearly half an hour. "this was fun, though."

"yeah," donghyuck agrees, retracting his hand from renjun's bicep. "we should do it again."

renjun bites his lip, sliding off the bed. donghyuck thinks he's going to just leave it at that, but he turns back at the door to say playfully, "maybe i don't want to."

"we shouldn't, then," donghyuck says, matching his tone.

renjun turns the doorknob back and forth, using his foot to keep the whole door from moving. "we can't let it get weird."

god, that's right. they have work and shit. "right. we won't."

renjun nods and finally exits the room. donghyuck collapses back onto his bed, heart pounding in his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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> [cc](https://curiouscat.me/mfalmp4)  
> 


	4. i know, you know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jeno has kissed jaemin twice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a bonus shortie because i feel so bad about the long break between chapters but like uhhmmm important note if you've already read the other chapters you should go back and reread at least chapter 2 cuz i changed some important details (mostly just jeno's involvement with the other members).
> 
> title from "i know" by aly & aj

jeno had his first kiss when he was 16. the other involved individual was 15, had freshly dyed brown hair like himself, and had been his best friend for years--still is. maybe.

it had been a spur of the moment thing. jeno commented on the fact that neither of them had had the opportunity to date before. his best friend, being a bit of a flirt, said, "maybe we should kiss each other and see if it's even worth it."

but, here's the thing. jeno may not be sure of everything he likes, but he knows it's not people like jaemin. jaemin is kind of a showoff, and that can be really annoying sometimes. he also wears his heart on his sleeve and jeno prefers people that don't show emotion easily, like himself. there's more reasons, jeno knows, but he can't think of anything. whatever. the point is, jaemin is the best friend he could ever ask for, but isn't someone he could ever see himself dating. it's not like they even could in this industry anyway.

he remembers it so clearly, though, that it must mean something. jaemin had leaned in first. both their lips were too dry, but it's not like it mattered because they didn't even know the mechanics of kissing yet. embarrassed by their immaturity, they vowed to never speak of it again. and that was that.

jeno kissed other people. he discovered that he likes people that are smaller than him, and that are a little aggressive. he first kissed renjun sometime last year, right before jeno's 17th birthday. he's kissed donghyuck a little bit, too, but he's around less, so they haven't really experimented all that much. it's good, though, and he'd been happy with that.

 

jeno kissed jaemin for the second time when he was almost 18. they were in their dorm bathroom, fighting over donghyuck. _smooth, right?_ now that he's thinking back on it, he's not sure what came over him in that moment. he usually doesn't think well under pressure, so maybe that was it? or maybe the proximity overwhelmed his senses so much that his brain malfunctioned. or maybe, just maybe, he was sick of harboring feelings for three (3!!! _3!!!!!!)_ people and wanted to do something about it.

whatever the case, jaemin is still ignoring him, which makes sense. they've never had a fight this bad. jeno was honestly scared that they were going to get physical. jaemin had grabbed at his shoulder in an attempt to push him into the door, but jeno had just pulled him closer by the biceps to--he doesn't know what, but they'd stumbled back together with the force of it. jaemin caught him with an arm around his waist like some stupid princess movie or something. and then, jeno had kissed him, as renjun laughed in the background, oblivious to jeno's mental failure. stupid. stupid. stupid.

what's even more stupid is how jaemin had kissed back. stupid jaemin. he'd cupped jeno's cheek to kiss him with just as much force, if not more. jeno hadn't known what to do other than just keep on kissing him. he's lucky ten busted open the bathroom door, or else they may have just kept on kissing like idiots.

jeno rolls over in his bed. thinking about it isn't helping at all. he's just stressing himself out. he knows he needs to talk about it, but no way is he going to risk involving more than just those parties involved, just in case word gets to their managers. this means he has three options:

1\. explain to donghyuck what happened. he would definitely tease jeno for fighting over him and for kissing jaemin in such a situation. he would only provide minimal help, though, both because he's busy and because he's an asshole.

2\. tell renjun about the kiss, and get teased endlessly about it in front of the kids. the problem here is that renjun is impulsive as hell so they might just end up making out on the couch again instead of talking about anything.

3\. skip the drama and just apologize to jaemin. this also comes with the risk of getting teased, but jaemin is less annoying than the others somehow. also, there's a possible added bonus of getting to kiss jaemin again??? which excites him even though he's not sure why.

honestly, he already knows which one to pick before he makes the list. determined, he gets out of bed and heads to jaemin's room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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> [cc](https://curiouscat.me/mfalmp4)  
> 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm thinking about dropping this work. I felt like I at least needed to wrap the nomin fight.

Jeno considers himself a pretty easy-going guy. Whatever life throws at him, he'll take it. It's not scary. What's scary can be taking initiative, especially in the face of change. Sometimes, change is incredibly difficult for simple, boring Jeno. This one knock is the hardest thing he's ever done.

Jaemin opens his bedroom door slowly. It's almost like he knows Jeno is behind it. A loose shirt and boxers are all he's wearing. He looks good--guarded, of course, but that's beside the point--and Jeno tries not to let his eyes linger on the bare skin. He has a monologue to get through.

"I'm sorry," He grits out. Jaemin nods, leaning against the doorframe. Thanking the heavens (Jaemin is notorious for holding grudges), Jeno continues. "I know what I said was stupid and dumb and I didn't have the right to get mad at you."

It's the end of the script, but Jaemin stares at him like he's waiting for more. It takes Jeno a moment to consider. With the opening here, Jeno can't help but admit what he's been holding in for so long.

"I really like Donghyuck." Jaemin nods again. It was probably already obvious from the fight. Heart pounding, Jeno plunges on. "I like you and Renjun a lot, too."

At that, Jaemin's mouth widens into a smile. "Me?"

"Yeah," Jeno mumbles, running his hands through his hair. "You."

Jaemin grins bigger, almost smugly. "I like them, too."

Jeno blinks. That's it? "Ok."

"Ok." Jaemin affirms, coming closer. Jeno backs away, feeling lighter than he has in months. Jaemin keeps coming, making Jeno feel lightheaded. He lets himself be guided into a kiss, right in the middle of the hallway. How could he say no when Jaemin's lips are just the right amount of messy? When it's so easy to lose himself in the feeling, to wrap his arms around Jaemin's waist and let himself be kissed like that?

A thought occurs to Jeno, so he pulls away momentarily. "You still," Jaemin pecks him on the lips, interrupting him. At this point, Jeno can't even try to get mad. "You still haven't apologized."

"I'm sorry for antagonizing you," Jaemin says, then cups his cheek and kisses him again and again and again in the dim light of the corridor. It feels so good. It feels so right.


End file.
